Apart from being something rain does especially when being onomatopoeically
combined with a 'pitter' the dictionary tells us this:
patter
\Pat"ter\, n. The language or oratory of a street peddler, conjurer, or the like,
hence, glib talk; a voluble harangue; mere talk; chatter; also, specif., rapid
speech, esp. as sometimes introduced in songs. [Cant or Colloq.]
However the dictionary does give the impression that patter is a lot of talk with
no real meaning designed by the street peddler or magician to merely confuse an
audience. For the serious entertainer this is of course not true. Patter has to
be interesting, funny and well-informed. For although it is true, in the magicians
case, that his patter is designed to draw peoples attention away from any false
moves or sleights he may be performing if his patter was not up to scratch it
wouldn't hold people's attention to distract them appropriately. When working
with balloons your patter is what you say while you prepare to make a model,while
you blow up the balloon, while you make a model,while you present it etc. Good
patter will hold an audiences attention, entertain on-lookers, control crowds
and generally give you the reputation of a quality entertainer.
Using patter in your act.
Some of you may be worried that you are not funny enough or won't
be able to think up enough to say. Fear not, although a performer may look like
they've got so many interesting and funny things to say that one may presume they
have been overly intimate with the Blarney Stone in most cases it is not just
coming out of the top of their head. Like most things in life patter has to be
learned and practiced.
If you are going to be performing a show or routine with balloons. Make sure you
have exactly what you are going to say written down and learned. You may think
well I'll say something like this then something about this and ad-lib the rest.
You are much wiser learning your routine exactly and then you will be able to
ad-lib or alter your routine with confidence.
If you are doing line work or strolling balloon modelling your patter will have
to appear off-the-cuff and relate to the situation. The way to do this is to learn
a large selection of patter lines for lots of different circumstances and string
them all together. For example if you learn patter lines regarding to the colour
of balloons, lines for the models you are creating and lines for different children
of different ages then when asked by a eight year-old girl for a green poodle
you will be able to string lines about green balloons, poodles and little girls
altogether into a continuous line of patter: "A poodle, isn't that what you step in when it's been raining cats and dogs?
and remember since he's a green poodle only feed him unleaded dog biscuits. Do
you promise to look after him? How old are you? Eight. What a coincidence I was
eight when I was your age. Well this poodle's only six so don't be bullying him"
Over the years some patter lines have been shared by entertainers
all over the world due to the fact that they always attain the desired reaction.
You'll notice as I make this model my hands never leave
my arms.
You:There you go a beautiful flutterby
Child: you mean butterfly
You: I know but I can't say butterfly
(This next line is supposed to be a bit of nonsense but since the advent of
a Mr J. Springer you get some weird replies.It's written for a male performer
talking to a girl but obviously it can be changed for female performers talking
to boys)
You: What's your name?
Girl:Susan
You: Ah, that was my name when I was a girl.
You: How old are you?
Child: 6
You: What a coincidence, I was six when I was your age.
You: What class are you in?
Child:P5
You: Aah, P5, the happiest four years of my life.
I like to make balloon animals because the twisty squeaky noises scare away
elephants. Yes, I know there are no elephants around here, it works really well
doesn't it.
When asked "Can I have a balloon for my little brother?"
"Sounds like a fair swap" is a good reply.
Balloon
HQ the balloon entertainer or decorater's resource has a large collection
of classic lines
Check out the patter section in Balloon
HQ this has a line for nearly any model. The list was compiled from entertainers
all over the world. I first came across BalloonHQ searching for new patter lines
and have been using their "Don't suck your head in" line for getting balloon hats
the right size ever since.
Writing your own lines for various animal models could not be easier as there
are a plethora of animal jokes already in existence.
Dogs
Yuck, this balloon smells of onions it must be a hot dog
Talking of hot-dogs did you hear about the Budhist monk who walked up to the
hot-dog vendor and said " Make me one with everything"
Use a Magic Pipe to put a watch in someone's balloon and call it a watch-dog
What is the other name for a sausage dog?
Daschund
Bless you
This dogs a terrible dancer...he has two left feet.
Teddy Bears
It's easy to make one of these you only have to know the bear essentials
I saw a bear once..a bear bum
(I don't usually go for the cheeky jokes but this can work well for the right
kids if you clasp your hand to your mouth in fake horror after you say it)
This bear is Daddy bear. Do you know the story?
"Who's been eating my porridge?" squeaked Baby Bear.
"Who's been eating my porridge?" cried Mother Bear
Burp!" said Daddy Bear.
This is Waterloo Bear...
...he got off at the wrong station
Here's a bear and rabbit joke you could use to accompany the making of both
animals.
It's a silly story but kids like it (and so do georges)
Once upon a time, there was a river. The Nile River, to be exact. On one side
of the river lived the rabbit, and on the other side lived the bear. One fine
day, the bear was sitting on a stump, enjoying his breakfest of berries. Then
he heard someone yelling at him. It was the rabbit.
''Hey! Hey, Teddy, get yourself over here. I've got something to show you!''
''Not now! I'm eating.''
''Oh come on!'' said the rabbit. ''It's really important.''
''No way.''
''Please. It's urgent.''
So the bear decided to go all the way over the wide river. It took him all day
and all night to get over to the other side. He nearly drowned. And when he
finally got there he was groaning and panting, and wheezing for air.
''Well, rabbit,'' he panted. ''What did you want to tell me?''
''Hey, Teddy,'' the rabbit began, ''look how many berries are on the other side
of the river.''
Birds
I've made you a parrot. I was going to make one sitting on a Perch but I heard
you don't like fish
Incidentally, do you know what's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
Swans can be accompanied by the classic Spike Milligan poem
Down the stream the swans all glide
It's quite the cheapest way to ride.
Their legs get wet,
Their tummies wetter
I think after all
The bus is better
Hats and Headgear
I told this hat to wait behind but it wanted to go on ahead.
From bhq...I need to get a true size for this hat so don't suck your head in.
